Well at least it seems that way anyhow. Its been one thing after another I swear. First of all my son is now officially in the military. I am so proud of him but its slowly driving me mad. I am still trying to deal with the OMG's and What Ifs of the whole thing. Its enough to drive me....
Then I had a stay in the hospital(no no no, not for the criminally insane, not yet, lol). I thought I was having a heart attack and after almost every test and poke and prod possible it turns out that I was overdosing myself on thyroid meds(I am such a dumb ass sometimes) to the point that it was messing with my ticker...but hey, my little heart is just fine...with the help of beta blockers right now until all the meds leave my system which could take up to six weeks then I can come off those too. Turns out that after an 80 lb weight loss you really should get the meds adjusted to your new size..heehee. So to drive me down the road of chaos a little further...
Our house bunny, Stewie, of 12yrs + had a bad siezure and now only has the use of one front leg. He has had a few siezures before but he came out of them fine and even now he "seems" to not be in any kind of pain. I have been agonizing over whether to end his life or not. Who am I to do so anyhow? I've been wondering what to do over a week now and finally took it to the Gods/Goddesses and Spirit realm for guidance this morning through meditation and the Spirit board. After lighting a candle and creating sacred space and with pendulm in hand I asked a few yes/no questions which I got RESOUNDING yes and no answers too. After stating a brief outline of why I needed their assistance I asked the first question:
Is it ok with the universe to take the life of a newly disabled pet and friend of so many years to ease any discomfort and pain he may be in?
Answer: A forceful swing indicating NO (almost seemed angry)
Should I let Nature take its course?
Answer: A wild swing indicating YES. (kinda scared me a little)
Is he in pain even though he doesn't seem to be?
Answer: A swing indicating NO.
So I accepted the answers that were given me and thanked Diety and the Spirits for thier much needed guidance and as I sat there with hands and pendulum still over the board presuming the session over I thought to myself " I hope I have the strength needed to care for him while he is like this for the rest of his days. I looked down and saw the pendulum swinging to indicate YES. It was in that moment that I TOTALLY excepted the answers given and then a calm just washed over me like a weight was lifted and now I know it will be ok for our Stewie. It still added to my crazy happennings though.
Then, to add to the....wait for it....
(I love that)
I had to go to the herb store and at the check out counter the cashier whips out a picture of a potato chip she found when she opened the bag. She said it had a picture of Jesus on it and that it was a divine message sent to her from god. For the life of me I couldn't see Jesus at all in the baked potato chip(it was just making me really hungry) but I smiled and nodded and said " oh yeah now I see it" all enthusiastic about it which made her happy. She wanted, no insisted that I take it and that it would be a collectors item one day. I shit you not she actually said that. I looked around cuz I honestly thought maybe I was getting Punked or something. I told her that she needed to keep it because it has definite meaning in her life and hers alone and how wonderful that is. She agreed. WOW. She was sweet though and hey what do I know it probably really does have specific meaning for her and thats wonderful!
After the last month I just had I hope sister checkout girl wasn't trying to one up me in the nutty crazy department cuz I'll have you know I just got a certificate for that month long looney class...see.... LMFAO