HAPPY ZOMBIE JESUS DAY!!!!

Seriously, anyone who is dead for three days and comes back to life is a zombie in my book. Back in the day when I was young and growing up I was scared of Jesus. Now its all perfectly clear to me, you know, WHY christians are told from the time they are born to give thier souls to Jesus....Cuz he wants to eat their brains!

For the longest time when I was a small kid and it was around Easter time I had a hard time opening a door to any dark room in the house because I was scared that dead jesus was going to be behind the door and grab me and take me to some unseen place and I never be heard from again.  See my grandfather was a southern baptist minister and when he gave a pulpit pounding sermon you about pissed your pants in fear of jesus and god. To a 5 or 6 year old kid thats just scary man, lol.

As I became a young adult it was starting to become more evident that there was something different about Jesus and his followers like when everyone was hypnotized or in a trance during communion. I know, I know, I was suposed to have my head bowed and my eyes shut but I just had to peak and it was like the congregation's minds had been taken over by some unforeseen diabolical force demanding them to (wait for it...)..."Eat the bread which is my bones and drink the wine which is my blood" EEEEEKKK! Blood and bones! EEEK! Now I knew there was something seriously wrong. As I am looking around the room I am thinking, no,  screaming in my head..." NOOOOO, Don't Do It" but it was too late they had symbolically become Zombie Jesuses too. Needless to say, I didn't return to church for quite awhile, lol.

So to everyone out there have a Happy Zombie Jesus Day and be careful opening any door to a dark room and be careful going passed any caves today....(shudders)

Wyckked Thoughts - random - very random

         Bringing out my Inner Hippie…for a minute

I have totally been into celestial happenings, stars, constellations, meteor showers, etc. as of late. I was outside the other night and noticed the heavens were full of stars and as I watched them in awe I saw a falling star and a random thought came into my mind, followed by another one and another one and….

What if each and every one of our souls are housed in our very own single star for all eternity? It could be possible I guess being that the stars are innumerable and the Universe limitless. What if when we leave our physical bodies on this planet .. a star falls? What if, what we equate as a star falling to that of a dying star or burnt out star is actually just repositioning itself in the Universe for that soul which has died to be brightly reborn anew in another location of the Universe for a new and continuing purpose and experience? What if we each have an invisible soul line connecting us from our single star-soul-home directly to our Soul Star Chakra where, when allowed to access it, we become greatly open to enlightenment and spiritual ascension and even to the Universal secrets and mysteries? Wouldn’t that be cool?

What if, when I pick up Charlie Sheen on our way to the funny farm we stop and get Lindsay Lohan so she can do a little “shopping” before she has to go to court…again? LOL.

WOW! The shit that comes out of my head amazes even me sometimes, lol. Now that’s some pretty random thinking…borderline Nutz to some probably(OK, most)lol.

I am such a Hippie! My hubby says he never gets tired of me and my off the wall thinking, but he does say that it kind of freaks him out cuz he actually finds himself contemplating the possibilities of some of my random thoughts, lol.

P.S. No psychotropic drugs were used in the generation of these random thoughts

Wyckked Thoughts - random - very random

The Late Great…

Well, on the tellie last night I heard somebody label someone who has recently died as the “Late” Mrs. So-and-So. This is another one of those words/phrases that sounds like nails down a chalkboard to me, yup another one, lol. Why do people consider a deceased person late? Do they expect the recently deceased to keep that appointment they had for whatever? Well sweeties, I don’t know about you, but this is one time I am not waiting around for Auntie This-Or-That or Uncle Who-Ever because she/he is now really “late” …I have things to do, lol and hopefully for quite a long while. They are not late…they are DEAD! Deceased! Finished!(at least physically anyhoo). This must send a really mixed message to young children. I can see little Suzie or Johnny at the funeral home after everyone has gone and mommy says “Honey, its time to go” and Suzie/Johnny says “Mommy, no, we have to wait for Auntie So-And-So, she’s on her way, just late that’s all!” POOR KID, lol. All I know is if Auntie or Uncle really is “late” then I am definitely NOT going to be the one who keeps feeding their parking meter until they get back! Not me…not in a million years! LOL! Just Saying….

Wyckked Thoughts - random - very random

My Worst Enemy

Yesterday I was talking to a friend and found myself uttering a phrase that I know I must have said hundreds of times before. For some reason I actually really listened to the words of the very phrase I just spoke. This phrase is definitely going on my “Stupidest Phrases I Have Ever Said” list. It’s quite a long list by the way. What I found myself saying was “I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy.” It just kind of grated my nerves as the words were coming out of my mouth because, in all actuality…. Hell Yeah I’d wish it on my worst enemy!! Why would I want for my worst enemy to have any more good fortune than myself? After all they are my WORST ENEMY. I would like to meet the person who started this phrase and ask them if they really, truly thought this one through. Why do we say this anyhow? Perhaps to climb some ladder to moral stardom in our own minds? Or to make others think that we are altruistic, bleeding heart martyrs whose unselfish well wishing transcends the utmost level of spiritual awareness? Personally I think this last one is horse-hockee. I don’t know about you but I was put on this beautiful planet by the universe as a mere human, with little ‘ol human DNA and a little ‘ol human way of thinking. After all I am only human(possibly another stupid phrase for the list, LOL) just like every other human. No better or less than another mere human. Why pretend to be saintly in someone else’s eyes if what I say is not what I mean? Wouldn’t that make me a hypocrite? Fake? And that’s not what I am or will be, especially to myself or anyone else for that matter. So the next time some crappy crap happens in my life hell yeah I will wish it on my worst enemy…because that bitch deserves it too, if not more, than me, just sayin’…..

Wyckked Thoughts - random - very random

The Pet Dog

We love him. He’s a good boy. He’s always there for us, through anything. He’s never judgmental and always loyal. We play fetch with him and he loves it. He could play for hours it seems. He brings us his favorite one and we take it and ask him in an overly exuberant voice if he wants to go get it and he, being a loving and loyal buddy picks his ears up and wiggles frantically. What if after all this time we got his intentions wrong … What if he was not bringing us his favorite toy for us to throw it for him? What if what he has really been doing all this time is bringing us a gift and we just throw it away…every time. Picture this, He is thinking “ I love my master, I will do the greatest honor and take her my favorite toy.” What a great gesture on his part. What a good boy. And what do we do? We take this wonderful offering of love…and THROW it as far as humanly possible. What if when we ask him if he wants to go get it and he is all wiggly and stuff he is really stressing out over it thinking “ NO,NO, DON’T. That’s for you, that’s for you, Keep it.” What if after we have thrown the toy and he chases after it, he is saying to himself “ You dumb ass, that is my special toy that I have bestowed upon you out of love and I am going to keep giving it back to you till YOU GET IT! Dumb Human!” Just a thought